A humor column –
Since tourism is a very familiar beat to him, he was inspired by what the current Tourism Secretary Wanda Teo said to “tone down” reports on killings in the Philippines.
In his most recent humor column, he therefore dregs up old and not-so-old memories of his former news beat and applies it to current events. Perhaps it will pass Wanda Teo’s strict standards in tourism reporting. But then again, it might not.
He leaves it to you to decide.
OPINION: An officially approved bus tour of Manila
Posted Mar 28 2017
Mabuhay, everyone! Welcome aboard our bus for our special new tour of our WONDERFUL city of Manila.
I’m your guide, Derma Dementa of MyLabs Tours, and I’m HAPPY to show you around my FABULOUS city. You’ve probably heard all those nasty fake reports about murders and killings and whatnot — THEY ARE LIES! LIES! ALL LIES!
Oh, I’m sorry sir! I didn’t mean to make you jump like that. Did I startle you? Here, let me pick up your glasses.
Are you all settled? Good. Before we start our tour, let me just say I’m so glad that as first-time visitors to my country, you arrived without having to go through THAT AWFUL SCAM in the airport where crooks would plant bullets in your luggage and then extort you. YES! No more “laglag bala” thanks to our GREAT DUTERTE GOVERNMENT! YAY! You are so lucky.
What’s that, you say? You spent three hours sweating in crowded lines in immigration because there weren’t enough personnel because most had resigned because they weren’t getting paid?
WELL WHO WANTS TO KNOW YOUR OPINION BUSTER?
Oh, no, I’m sorry mam, for going off like that. Here, let me put your seat back in the upright position.
Let me tell you something about my company. We are a group of friends who are SICK AND TIRED of all the NEGATIVE PUBLICITY this country has been getting from LYING MEDIA so we pooled our money together and formed a small startup, Obosen Tours, so we can show foreigners the TRUTH.
To read the rest, click on this link.