Just a humor column
There is nothing like a beauty contest to lift up troubled spirits.
That’s what the dictator Ferdinand Marcos did in 1974 when he hosted the Miss Universe beauty pageant.
And that’s what his loyal supporter, President Rodrigo Duterte, did this year by hosting another Miss Universe pageant amid the extra-judicial killings.
So this is also what my hubby Alan is recommending to the low morale police in his latest humor column:
What the PNP needs to do
Mar 31, 2017
Times are bad for the Philippine National Police (PNP). It’s being linked to the wave of extra-judicial killings (EJKs) that’s victimized thousands, as well as human rights violations. Last year, two police inspectors were arrested shortly after they murdered an anti-crime activist. This year, senior officers in central headquarters were implicated in the kidnap, ransom and strangling of a Korean businessman.
This week, a superintendent who used to head a crime lab was caught doing drugs.
Things don’t look good. Morale is low, discipline is shaky. Drastic measures seem to be called for. Can anything be done?
Yes, of course! Springing into action, PNP’s higher-ups have announced a BEAUTY CONTEST for female police officers.
Exactly what the situation calls for, right? Now now, no need to be shy about it, you rascally policemen you — deep in your hearts, you know nothing lifts police spirits more than the sight of female bods sashaying in tight and skimpy outfits. Of COURSE it should be policewomen… young, sexy, nubile policewomen. Because who wants to see a beauty pageant of policeMEN? Can you imagine PNP commander Ronald “Bato” dela Rosa in a bikini? That might push demoralization right over into full-scale depression. Or rioting. With lots of screaming.
But wait: we caution the PNP — don’t treat this as a mere flesh feast. A police beauty contest should have relevance. The candidates, rather than simply sauntering in tight shirts, shorts and swimsuits, should also compete on brains and abilities. Here’s our suggested plan. Test the contestants on skills related to the PNP’s current war on drugs.
For instance, police officers should be capable of rapidly assessing situations in order to make crucial decisions. Contestants should show their proficiency in the following skills:
– How to spot a fentanyl addict and make sure it’s not the President;
– How to profile a violent personality and make sure it’s not the President;
– How to detect a foul-mouthed arrogant braggart and make sure it’s not the President.
And once the contestant has established it’s not the President, the contestant can demonstrate her proficiency in shooting the suspect.
This could be immediately followed by a high-speed, tape-wrapping competition…
To read the rest, pls. click on this link.
Johnny Lin says
Women Empowerment Forum in Malacanang
Female officials working for Duterte defended his misogynist attitude.
So far Gabriela group did not criticize these female govt officials on their speeches.
It’s unfortunate a forum to DIGNIFY women turned out to be a gathering to defend a misogynist.
Babae, anong saaaaay mo?
He he he
merong mga granddaughters si digong, hope he’s okay kung may mangbabastos sa kanila. hihipu-hipuin sila, kukurotin ang pwet, o kaya, squeeze, okay lang kay digong, e? he’ll just laugh and say, good on you, girl, more pa. and wear shorts short, show off legs. at saka yong sisters ni digong, they’d be happy being treated thus, hahampasin sa bum, hey, pretty woman stay a while, pretty woman jiggle your cup size 38 dd, double barrel, make my day, he, he, give us a kiss!
at saka yong anak ni digong na si kitty who just graduated high school. at 18?(?) kitty would be considered young woman now, mature na. at her 1st job, if her boss make passes at her, she’ll just smile and say, how nice. more pls. and if she goes to college and if her male classmates makes rude remarks at her, okay lang sa kanya. forgiving yan e. kitty is empowered to accept men’s misogynistic tendencies, after all, she is from that household.
give digong a dose of his own fentanyl! see how he likes his women treated the way he treated other women.
gabriela is defending women’s dignity, whereas the women employed by digong are defending their hefty pay packet. one emphatized, the other categorized with blind forgiveness as currency.
I think, it’s stupid to be forgiving only for the one forgiven to continue on being idiot. they ought to tell the idiot to start behaving and start having mores, and withdraw the forgiveness bit. at 72, digong is being condescended.
Supt. Marvin Marcos and company … Du30 will be giving them pardon with promotion pa!
Wow na wow…. so new bread of Death Squad ni Du30?
marvin marcos and co. ought to be promoted to the next life, the one not of this world. they’re needed there. hay, the 300 kapolisan sent to basilan agrabyado ngayon, nagkasala sila but not given promotion. life is not fair talaga, might as well make it fair. impeach digong!
Spat between alvarez and floirendo could be a looming business interest in the 5000+ hectare banana farm. Chinese traders and/or financiers are abound in davao looking for banana suppliers for the growing mainland China market…. just a wild guess.
to digong and company,
do you hear the people sing..
Johnny Lin says
After vacating the Assistant Secretary of Social Welafare office, LB has landed a new job, courtesy of PNP chief General Bato. Her Facebook “suck it to Duterte” twit promoting child phonography was not futile. Her sexual cravings would be satisfied 24/7.
She is being tasked to head PNP cybernet section on child pornography. Sec of Tourism wanting to increase tourists visit in the country loss out from the bidding of her services, by counting on many European tourists reached by the Facebook promotions of the DSWD executive
He he he
Johnny Lin says
Gen Bato is ” perfect 10″ for cross dressing. No hair to cover with “James Brown” wig(ask Bill O’Reilly).
He also possesses the physical silhouette of oversized SI model Ashley Graham (check those muscular thighs).
He will be repeating official female impersonators history by following the footsteps of another General, Fidel Ramos in his silly gyrating hips to the tune of Pearly Shells wearing Hula skirt to entertain the Martial Law chief, Ferdinand Marcos. Suck it to the dictator, Ramos became president.
Bato sucking it to the Authoritarian Duterte, who knows, might become president someday.
Not necessarily, the Philippines
He he he
That’s a ray of sunshine, the policewomen are getting prettier while the policemen are getting uglier and heavier. It’s the feminization of the time. I wouldn’t discount their shooting skills that is why Bato recommends them and good for him, he is now the proud owner of the POLICEWOMEN BEAUTY CONTEST2017; he has the mind of a savvy entrepreneur. Having said that, these women can learn a few from him after their jobs or duties end or they have relinquished their Tokhang designed crowns. Voila, they can make a few connections from the Vietnamese billionaire to be” lady mama” and send their resume here:
Tip: Don’t ever make the mistake of calling them South Koreans for they are fiercely patriotic. Bato wouldn’t want to hear of it either, believe me you won’t get a boost. Remember, CRAME IS NOT THE CAPITAL of South Korea, OK? get it?
3 ride in tandem gun salute, BANG ,BANG ,BANG !
“Annyeong Haseyo, uups my bad, that’s Korean.
Pretty women, walking down the streets
Pretty women, patrolling the streets
May beauty contest po ang pnp
Ganda pulis 2017 pla read Ricky lo entertainment section thanks